maricruz has reached her fundraising goal on HandUp!

About me.

I am 24 years old and am an army veteran. I've lived in Corvallis since July 10th of 2014. I live at Community Outreach family shelter. We are a family of 6 soon to be 7. I have a 6, 4, 3, and a 1 year old and the youngest is 5 months now. My fiancé works at the men's cold weather shelter ironically and I am unemployed which is very frustrating to me. We spend our time reading fairy tale books and different other kind of books like bilingual since my kids attend bilingual schools. We like to go to the park when its not so cold and I enjoy spending time with them no matter how big the challenge it is. we also like to bake and cook together which is very exciting for them. When I'm not playing teacher, chef, janitor, and referee. I play video games on my vita or on my phone or spend a quiet dinner late at night with my fiancé since our schedules are opposite from each other so what little time we have together to spend everyday is nice.

My backstory.

My life has never been a walk in the park. I've had PTSD and anxiety for as long as I remember and it was labeled as drama queen or emotionally exaggerated. I've been asked by mental health professionals the question of " have you ever been abused?" I always tell them the same thing." there are 4 forms of abuse: verbal , physical, mental and sexual. I have suffered all three." as an adult I've dealt with it the only way I can which is distraction and forget everything and never look back. I've always had my phone in my face kids to round up and appointments to go to and anything from keeping my mind out of well my mind. I had a very abusing marriage with my ex-husband and I thing it was the most traumatizing because your parents is one thing but someone whom you wanted to spend the rest of you life with does the worst to you knowing your past is very heartbreaking and traumatizing in the way he did, and now I'm homeless with my kids and my fiancé came late in the picture and accepted me for who I am and who I've become because we were high school sweet hearts. He was devastated and furious of my current mental problems and my past marriage and all the events leading to today and his mission is to do what ever it takes to get back to "normal" or close to it. I told him about the need for a service animal because no matter how hard things got I always had a dog named spud. he was my everything made everything better and I enjoyed him the kids knew him very late in his age and were very upset he passed away. Now its hard to get through the day and have that special support of which he took place in making it a lot easier to live with myself and everything and everyone around me,.........and now he's gone. I didn't realize how big of a dent he put in my life. and now it kills me and it effects my kids and it effects my fiancé and it sucks feeling the way I do with the situation I'm in because I cant help my self up and it sucks to admit it but I'm not able to pick myself up to better our situation not without the help of a new companion. For some reason only animals fill a gap that no human can fill and its not uncommon for folks to feel this way which is why they have these animals to help on a level that puts the twinkle in our eyes everyday and make to where we want to go out and want to do better and feel confident that nothing and no one will hurt us at the park or the grocery store or on the way home or anywhere.

My goals, moving forward.

I am working toward my certification for a pharmacy technician. I have a difficulty paying attention in class and spud was awesome at helping me focus. I start in January again at OSU hopefully. I am working with vocational rehab which helps place people in the employment position that accommodates to their disability and help them grow from it and learn how to have and KEEP a stable job which I sorely lack. I also have help from the Veterans Affairs office to complete my claim for disability comp and hopefully in time it will be approved. I also have the department of human services and case managers from different organizations to help with housing, paperwork, obtaining important records (i.e. birth certificates) everything except help for my most important tool that helps me function. which is my service animal. and hopefully with your help and donations I can achieve everything to make a better life for myself with a sound mind and health. I can express how important this animal means to me he is at the humane society in Corvallis and his name is rahjeera he's a Staffordshire bull dog mix and is 1 year old hopefully I can adopt him before anyone else can because I have an insane connection with this dog and not having funds to bring him home and train him to do his job that he does well when I visit him and certify him to have him anywhere I go with out being turned down services by having him. he needs a new home and I need a new companion and with everyone's help we can accomplish our goals and be a happy and healthy family. the key to my goals and happiness in life is a service animal and he's the one to help me achieve them.

Other things I'd like to share about myself.

My proudest moment in my life happened quite a few times. and that's seeing my kids for the first time. having them not so much because it obviously hurt but after ward it was as if life stood still and everything melted away and spud was right there telling me every time, your the best person ever and everything will be okay, and it was perfect. he took a chunk of my heart when he passed away. and I haven't been the same since.

• I hope you have read and understood my story as to why I need your help today and what it means to me and my family. thank you and have a blessed day.